30 Days and Counting

Today marked the first month anniversary of this work-out torture. I have exactly three months until my wedding. I've lost a total sum of probably 7 pounds at most, 4 at least, but more importantly is that I feel really good. Sore, but really good. I've also lost more than an inch and half on my arms and thighs and two inches in my waist (though I question my measurement there as there is no appreciable change in how my clothes fit).

Here's how a few things have changed:

The Plank: A dirty piece of stationary torture -- you get yourself ready for a push up -- as in, your arms hold you up in the position to start a push up, with your butt and back straight like a plank -- then you just hold it. Try it; it's really hard to do. First couple times I went for 15 - 20 seconds with arms shaking under the duress. Today, I went 30 seconds on the first round and an astounding 40 seconds on the second. It was terrifically hard, but I was determined. I'm aiming for a minute in the next week.

Pull-downs: this is the lats workout; it's not so hard if you have upper body strength, which apparently I have. My trainer, Vlad-Stein the blood thirsty, put me at 75 pounds today. I've been at 40 to 50 previously. He had to spot me the last couple pull downs, but I did it! I can feel my arms are firmer and it feels good.

Deltoid presses: I can't describe this one, but here's how it went: Started out with 30 pounds which seemed too light. We added another 10, upping it to 40 pounds, and suddenly it was extremely hard. I couldn't figure it out. Got to 10 reps and I thought I was going to lose it... suddenly there's this loud *thunk* as a weight bar drops from the bar... seems 10 pounds have somehow stuck itself to the weights ... so I was lifting 5o pounds instead of what we thought was 40. Go figure. Stein thought that was effing hilarious, but I thought it was kind of funny as well.


Stein had me do some core work that entails working weights or resistance to each side, working the muscles that used to be my waist. He wanted 15 reps on each side. On the second set, he jokingly asked for 5 more, after the first 15... I asked if he was kidding, and he said, Okay, just two more... and I said, "NO way, you said five more, I'm giving you five more." I think I felt like I was going to drop to the floor and beg for mercy, but I didnt: I gave those five more.

That really buff woman who is probably in my age range was there, as usual, doing her usual crazy ab workout and squat presses. S"he impresses me no end, and I keep looking to her as the person I can be. She is always so supportive -- says hi, waves to me... today, put her hand out while she was doing her insane superwoman ab workout for a high-five, and I took her hand. It gave me strength. I don't know her name, but she is so fucking cool, and an inspiration.

My cardio on the treadmill is up from 2.0 at the start of this things to 3.5, which is very nearly jogging (my nemesis). It's not easy, but I enjoy the fact that I can do it at all.

Two days ago, on Saturday, feeling guilty for not doing any real exercise, I got on the stationary bike at home and did the hill climb sequence at level 4, which proved to be quite hard for me. I felt virtuous for doing it, and I did do it to completion, with an additional 3 minute cool-down, too. I should be doing better and more, but that will come with Stein's insistence that I do 30 minutes at the gym every day of the week between our workouts. I'm commited, or defeated. Don't know which, but I'm going to do it.

What I notice after this first month are: increased stamina and lung capacity. My upper arms are much firmer and less wiggly. My face is thinner. My back doesn't hurt when I do simple things like sweeping or mopping the house. My ability to squat/kneel is increased -- I was avoiding squating or kneeling because I felt so shaky; now I feel more centered. My agility is increased, I have more range of motion.

It's starting to feel less like walking into a painful torture session when going to my workouts than it did. It's not easy, but it feels like I'm regaining some control over my body once again. If I didn't have to see myself in a mirror while nakid, I'd say I look pretty good... gimme a couple months... I'll get there.